Saturday, May 31, 2003

Ever get the feeling you should have gone home? Ever get the feeling you've been talking to someone all night, and it just might have been yourself? Ever woken up on a 2 squaremeter balcony wearing sunglasses and had a sore neck? Ever been told you've been hanging out with the guys from Inside The Whale, and you don't remember? Ever made drunken phonecalls to your friends because your imaginary friend told you it would be a good idea?

Well. You're not the only one

Thursday, May 29, 2003

I Flew To Close To The Sun On Wings Of Pastrami.

I'm getting increasingly frustrated with this 6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon thing. I know it's an old concept, but we've been trying to beat it for a while. I was standing in the kitchen making a sandwich, when it suddenly hit me. Heureka! The guy who plays Orlok in Nosferatu. Obviously he couldn't be connected to Kevin Bacon.... Well, actually he has a Bacon count of 3. Bollocks. I'm running out of obscure actors, and I'm not even close to beating it. Damn!

Wednesday, May 28, 2003

It Must Be Summer

I'm ready. I'm ready for summer now. I'm wearing shorts, a hawaii shirt, I'm sitting inside and I'm wearing sunglasses - let's go! Homer once said that hawaii shirts are only for homosexuals and fat party animals (or something like that, I only remember the Danish translation. D'oh!), and I'm planing to be the latter this summer. The weather forecast for June is HOT HOT HOT, so I'm getting increasingly psyched about going to a festival, although I would gladly spend 2 hours in pouring rain just to see Iron Maiden.

I'm ready for the Champions League final. I've got a 6-pack of Tuborg in the fridge, cigarettes and diet Coke. There's a very real chance the game is gonna suck, because Italian football is pretty boring, but I'm hoping Milan will somehow have shifted into Arsene Wenger mode and play some great football. It is afterall the last game of the season, and the most important one.

I'm ready for the new Fountains of Wayne album. I'm listening to Utopia Parkway right now, and it is possibly one of the best summer albums ever. I got into FoW during my much dreaded collegerock period and it's one of the only albums from that period that I still hear regularly. Red Dragon Tatoo, Lost In Space and It Must Be Summer are just some of the best feel good summer songs ever written.

Otherwise I'm completely out of the loop. Once upon a time I gotstupid/weird/funny links everyother day, but not lately, so I've got nothing today. Sorry.

Tuesday, May 27, 2003

And Not a Word About U2

According to Arseblogger Arsenal are pretty close to signing Thomas Sorensen from Sunderland, which would have been agreat deal if he hadn't been rather crap ever since dropping that ball against England in the World Cup. Still it would be nice to have some Danish players on at Arsenal, and they could definitely do worse.

I just saw a headline that said Mr Cuper's Right Hand Leaves Inter. Ouch, that gotta suck. Fortunately for Inter the rest of Mr Cuper apparently stays.

It's actually a beautiful day outside, not a cloud in sight, and I have to go outside now since it's that time of month where you have to go sell some bottles before you can buy breakfast

Sunday, May 25, 2003

Life Is Killing Me

As I stated the other day Football can indeed be a very cruel game. On Wednesday Celtic lost the Uefa Cup final, and today they lost the league. Losing the league in the last game by goal difference is the football equivalent of having Angelina Jolie tell you that she only wants to be friends. Utterly dissapointing. For a long time it looked as if Arsenal would win the double and Celtic would win both the league and Uefa Cup, which for me would be a double-double, or quadruple if you will. Yet now I'm stuck with only the Fa Cup. A double bypass if you will.

Normally when everybody likes a movie my instinct tells me to hate it. Exhibit A is Star Wars which I find thoroughly crap, exhibit B is Lord of the RIngs which I just found plain stupid, and I have subsequently refused to see the sequals. The same thing is starting to happen to The Matrix 2. Although I like the first one, I just find the concept of a sequal stupid. Since Keanu/Neo now officially has the combined talents of Buddha, Superman and Kant, I find it very hard to believe that he will not come victoriously out of the third movie. Maybe it's just me...

Thursday, May 22, 2003

Spring Spending Spree

I'm busted today, been working all day and the office gets extremely hot becaue 1) it's in the sun, and 2) there's 8 computers running at all times. Can hardly wait 'till summer ...

After visiting this page I realized that I probably have to go buy the new Nada Surf album, afterall it was one of the best concerts I've seen in a while. I wanted to learn to play Blizzard Of 77, but the ol' crap guitar at my parents' place is down to 5 strings, so that has to wait.

Another album I'll have to buy real soon is the new Eels album, although I was listening to Daisies... the other day, and it's really not terrific, but Beautiful Freak is one of my all time favorites.

Somehow it had slipped under my radar, but Type O Negative are playing on Train the Sunday before Roskilde, so that's even more money I don't but will somehow have to find.


Over a period I've been checking how people enter my page, and a frightening amount end up here due to typing errors. Apparently a lot of people are looking for nuclaer bombs, Gorge Bush etc. And then of course the occasional search for "Matthew Upson Naked". How creepy is that? Well, at least it wasn't Dean Kiely.

Holy Diver

Football can be so cruel. Stupid football. Always getting my hopes up only to tear them down again. Stupid hopes. To be fair Celtic didn't create much, their attacks actually made me miss good ol' John Hartson. Stupid Chris Sutton. Porto players were flying left and right everytime anybody touched them, Vitor Baia even made a dive which saw him roll from his goal halfway up to the midfield. Stupid c*nt. Now all we need is Celtic losing their last game, and Arsenal somehow travelling back in time and losing the FA Cup.

And on my way home some wanklord of a cab-driver for some reason decided that it would be in it's place to roll down his window and yell at me, because he thought I had pushed the button that changes the green light to red. Stupid git. People like that can really piss me off. Especially because I didn't push the button, but if there's one thing I learned from watching DeNiro, it is you don't mess with psycho cab-drivers.

I submitted this site to a number of blog index pages, so maybe more people will find their way into my page. If everything goes according to plan, this time next year I'll be known as the bastard child of Dave Barry and Nick Hornby.

Wednesday, May 21, 2003

Free At Last.... For Now

Having lived through my two written exams, I've allowed myself to hang out a bit before returning to the second leg of the exams. Hanging out in this case means going to work everyother day. But today I've just been hanging out though.

Tonight we'll watch the Uefa Cup Final between Celtic and Porto. The great thing about having a "second team" is that you can watch one of your favorite teams without having to wander around all nervous all day, like it was the case before the FA Cup final. And if they lose I won't be pissed off and go directly to bed like when Arsenal lost to Galatasaray. So I'm looking forward to tonight. And then the season is over until the beginning of August, and I'll have nothing to do, nothing to write and no excuse to go to the pub everyother day. What to do? I now have a choice of either focusing on the stuff that's important in life, all the stuff I've neglected this last year, getting in some culture, reading the classics etc, OR I could sit around moping, waiting for the new season to begin. Frankly, it can go either way...

And speaking of the classics: Buffy Bites The Dust. I havn't really been watching it so much lately, but I did for a while. Actually I believe the term "A Buffy-Date" was coined at our English department, so people could hook up after a night on the town and watch Buffy, drink gallons of Coke and tend their hangovers. I actually know girls who have Buffy books. And it was always fun to see the Star Wars geeks and Trekkies going on about how stupid Buffy (the show) is, because it wasn't realistic.... hmmm. It is indeed a pretty dorky department.

Sunday, May 18, 2003

The Consummate Hipster: newbies bow to him, everyone else just stares, as he swagger down the street with
You are the Consummate Hipster. Newbies bow to
you, everyone else just stares, as you swagger
down the street with "Little Green
Bag" stuck in your head.

What Kind of Hipster Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

New motto: Live however the fuck you want. Just do it with style, attitude and smarts. It doesn't hurt to drive a cool car and/or shiny scooter, but if you can't afford a cool car and/or shiny scooter, adopt a monkey. They're hilarious no matter what.

Dead Man Walking

I really don't think there's any words that can desribe exactly how much I hate studying Syntax and Morphology. I hate it even more than I hate Phil Collins. It's one of those sneaky things where, as you read it you think "Obviously, this makes sense", but when you have to explain it yourself..... nothing! I have a pretty bad feeling about this exam. But, I've almost read all there is to read, and now I just have to look at a couple of notes - watch Shanghai Noon on tv (again) - read a bit more, and then put the book under my pillow and hope that all the information will somehow enter my head while I'm sleeping. I remember Charlie Brown doing that once, not sure if it worked or not, but I'll give it a try. Hmmm, now I want to read Peanuts instead of study. Stupid lousy attention span.

Never Underestimate The Awesome Power Of The Kaibash

Well, we won the FA Cup yesterday in a game that wasn't really fantastic, but very exciting. Arsenal were under a lot of pressure and the ref seemed to make some odd calls every now and then, Marsden from Southhampton made at least 3 bookable offences, but only received 1 yellow card, and Henry, who within the first 27 secs literally dragged a guy who was lying on the ground clinging on to Henry's shirt for 5 meters, was later booked for diving. Parlour wasn't wearing his shooting boots, and Freddie didn't complete his Fa Final scoring hat-trick, but Oleg was superb in central defence. Where was he when we needed him for the rest of the season? And where were all the Arsenal-chicas at the pub at all the other games?

The game obviously led to us having some beers, and then some more, so I didn't get any reading done, so that's the plan for today. That and watching Buffy...

Saturday, May 17, 2003

Don't Choke, Don't Choke

Oh God! It's Fa Cup time again, and I'm already getting pretty nervous. Arsenal with no defence whatsoever against James Beatie - and 10 other guys. It's pretty much nothing to win, everything to lose. I hate that kind of games. Well, GO ARSENAL!

I saw Confessions of a Dangerous Mind yesterday, and it was pretty excellent, albeit a bit silly here and there. But definitely worth a recomendation.

That's it for now - have to wander around and be restless....

Henry has signed new Gunners deal, and Robert Pires is expecting to sign in a couple of weeks. F*ckin excellent news!

Thursday, May 15, 2003

Rock The Kaibash

You heard that we were great

Now you think we're lame

Since you saw the show last night

You hoped that we would rock

Knock it up a notch

But rocking was nowhere in sight

(Local H - All The Kids Are Right)

I'm going to a concert with some local bands tonight, and I'm not really sure how it's gonna turn out, I've only heard of one of the bands, Fillip, who are a pretty good rock band, but as far as I know the rest of the bands could be some really crappy shoegazer-bands. I usually don't have much tolerance for local bands, but I guess there's always the possibility of surprise. The place should be packed with familiar faces so it'll probably be good fun anyhow. And it'll be pretty cool to se my friends play the best venue in Aarhus

Lately I've been trying to get some studying done, and I had my exam in translation yesterday, which I won't get into because I don't wanna jinx it. Tomorrow we'll go see Confessions of a Dangerous Mind which I've been looking forward to. And then of course there's the FA Cup final coming just around the corner, which could put the kaibash on my plans to study.

Monday, May 12, 2003

The Great Indoors

You can only read so much Syntax and Morphology in one day before you go insane. I've managed to read even less, but I'm still sick and tired of it already. The good thing about studying at my parents' place is there is no distractions, but when you don't wanna read anymore there is absolutely nothing to do. So since my parents live virtualy right nextdoor to the great Danish countryside, I decided to take a walk through the local forrest. It was pretty much as big a non-event as you would imagine, the forrest really needs to get some decent sidewalks and perhaps some mosquito-nets, I've got enough mosquito bites to last a lifetime. I did meet a guy who looked exactly like Frank Zappa on a mountain-bike, and he even said hi. It always amazes me that everybody outhere feels it is their duty to say hi to everyone they meet, even though they obviously don't know me. But they are so friendly outhere in Deliverance-country.

Oh, and I totally stole this from Emme, and it's really quite worrying.

Don't forget to list your monkey/snake songs in the comments...

Sunday, May 11, 2003

The Monkey Likes You

Apparently Arsenal don't really cope that well with being second best, Gilberto says United didn't deserve to win, which is basically a bunch of crap since they managed to get more points than Arsenal, and as I recall that's the name of the game. Gilberto on the other hand didn't deserve to start in every game, so that just goes to show what an unfair world we live in. I would have liked to see more of Gio and Edu this season, but that wasn't to be. So now the season is over, and though it has been very enjoyable for the most part, I'm a bit whelmed right now: Hammers were relegated which they didn't deserve, Bolton wasn't, Everton failed to qualify for Europe which I kinda hoped they would - and of course Arsenal can still fuck up and not win any trophies. Next year I say we go for the Worthington Cup.

It's probably just as well that the season is over, it's time to study, and study hard, if I am to have any hope of passing my 100's of exams. I can't say I'm all hyper about it. I have to read a book called The Theory of Critisism - From Plato to the present, plus study for the insanely interesting Syntax and Morphology course, so now I'm back at my parents' place, where there are no distractions. Well, except from the extremely mediocre The Skulls which was even worse than I remembered. But it's probably better than this movie.

I'm kinda brainstorming an idea for our school magazine about The quest to find out which animal is more Rock N' Roll - the snake or the monkey? The idea is to find out which animal there are more references to in rock lyrics. So far I've compiled quite a few monkey-songs i.e. Shock The Monkey (Peter Gabriel), Monkeybusiness (Skid Row), Monkeywrench (Foo Fighters) and the list goes on. So if you have any monkey- or snake-songs, feel free to write in the comments. The only criteria is that there is a reference to a monkey or a snake, and it doesn't have to be in the title.

...And Not A Word About Football

Today has been all about doing as little as possible. Our little party yesterday got way out of hand, so today everyone I've talked to has had weird stories to tell, including the guy who woke up on his floor, on his hands and knees, with his head on the bed and then vomited on his floor. And no, that wasn't me!

I watched Buffy The Vampire Slayer, which I for some reason hadn't seen before even though I've seen a lot of the series. There are a surprising amount of cool actors in it, including Stephen Root, who was added to my cool-list when I saw him as Milton in Office Space, and I had almost forgotten how hot Kristy Swanson is. She has just been added to my list of reasons why i have to see Dude Where's My Car.

There's been nothing on TV tonight, a lot of "Docu-Soaps", reality TV and naked people. The weirdest program was about people who was having sex in public places without knowing they were being filmed by surveilance cameras. For some reason my VCR felt I had to watch that program, it stopped Buffy repeatedly while the show was on.

Later I saw an episode of Twillight Zone - I was hoping for some cool actors, but instead it was with Helen Mirren in a pair of possesed shoes. Damn!

Thursday, May 08, 2003

Get Out Your Riot Gear - The Boys Are Here

Ain't nothing much happening today, so I'll just post a couple of links that are mildly interesting:

The new Dandy Warhols video, while not exactly brand spanking new, is worth checking out. Courtney is sporting a mohawk a la Tommy Lee in the Motley Crue Dr Feelgood era, but looks a bit more on the gay side. I tried to find a picture of T-Bone with a mohawk but failed, instead I found this picture of a Motley Jew. Nice!

Danish newspaper BT has an article on the new Metallica record, and suposedly it's all balls out metal, with no ballads, like back in the good ol' days, so I'm actually looking forward to the show at Roskilde this summer.

And finally a picture that shows how good a night it was for football yesterday: Bob Pires saying HI to a Celtic fan on Highbury.

Anyone For Tennis?

When I walked into my kitchen tonight, with a big dumb grin on my face, a girl who lives here too said: "I know that goofy look; either you've just had sex or Arsenal have just won... I'm guessing Arsenal!". She has a very impressing, sometimes scary, gift for funny comments that can in retrospect sound like a slap in the face. But she was right, and what a magnificent victory it was: 6-1 home against South-f*ckin'-hampton, in what has been described as the dressed rehearsal before the FA Cup final.

It is very hard to remain pessimistic when stuff like this happens, so obviously Arsenal will somehow fuck up, and lose the FA Cup, just to bring me back down on earth. They have a rare gift for that. The only bad things I can think of in tonights game is that a) Stuart Taylor-Taylor didn't get his clean sheet bonus, which he really deserves, and b) Henry seemed kinda bummed that he couldn't score some goals and get The Golden Boot, so he looked less than happy when leaving the pitch. But he didn't really seem focused or very dangerous tonight. Even got a stupid yellow card.

A hat-trick by Jermaine Pennant (notice the kinky Kriss Kross eyebrows), who I've only seen in action twice before (both as subs), made it arguably the best starting XI debut ever. Combined with Celtic's 4-1 win tonight it has been a great night for me football-wise.

The best summer I can remember so far is back in '98 when both Arsenal and Celtic won, I finished high school and went to the Roskilde Festival , and since I am once again going to Roskilde, it could turn out to be a very pleasant summer for me, if I manage to complete my 1000's of exams.

I taught myself to play Unintended by Muse on guitar today, but it is nearly impossible to play the intro unless you have 8 fingers on your left hand, and they don't get in the way of each other. So now I just need to learn to sing with a high girlish voice, and I'll be ready to serenade the chicks this summer.

Oh, and while searching for pictures of Kriss Kross I found this homepage - talk about blasts fom the past.

Sunday, May 04, 2003

Second Comes Right After First

A big HI to my friends in America who somehow stumbled across this page.

It's been a rough couple of days; Thursday was just plain ol' drinking, Friday I saw Insidious Torment competing in the University boatrace and later I joined the future tutors for a party. I still haven't decided whether or not I'll be a tutor this year. We went down to the pub Saturday and saw Liverpool - Man City, and it's always fun to see Liverpool lose, especially because their supporters generally are bit more dissapointed than everybody else, so there was a lot of shouting, and people were really pissed off.

It wasn't that much fun today to see Arsenal lose the championship, but I've decided that I'll never be as childish as the stupid Liverpool fans, so I'm trying to see the glass as being half full - Being 2nd isn't that bad afterall. I mean; everybody still remember the 2nd person on the moon: mister, ehhh..... Whatshisname...

Tonight we'll go see X-Men 2, which could turn out to be crap, but as far as I remember the first one was ok. I think.
Oh, and the 2nd person on the moon was of course Buzz Aldrin.

Thursday, May 01, 2003

Workers Unite.... And Drink.

Pictures from the DNL Bar have been posted here for your viewing pleasure.

Today is the Socialist Workers' Day, but since I am neither a Socialist or a worker, it doesn't mean the world to me. I wrote a little thing about May 1. last year, and I thought I would just post a tiny excerpt from it today since it's just lying around my computer and hasn't done anything since it was published in DNL last year in an issue about how people felt about May 1. I wrote about "celebrating" May 1 in the Botanical Garden:

...there are people who go to the Botanical Garden to take a political stand and show their banners, but a vast majority of the audience are there to catch some sun, drink, smoke and just hang out in general. Also, it is a bit ironic that May 1. is supposed to be the workers' day, but most of the crowd consists of students, punks and slackers. Perhaps the organizers themselves are to blame for this, though I'm not sure they think of this as being negative, because there is always a big crowd, and it is one of the few great Aarhus traditions. But I doubt that if any members of Dansk Folkeparti where there, they would be converted.

Let me make a run-through of the entertainment/speeches at a typical May 1. in the garden: Typically we have a band called something in the vein of 'Det Roede Band', which consists of two female schoolteachers from the early 80's playing guitar and singing, accompanied by a guy clad in brown velvet and looking most of all like a human bong. Then we have a speech from the leader of the socialist-children organisation REBEL (honestly, I'm not making this up.) who screams old socialist slogans for about 15 minutes, with the kind of conviction in his voice you only find at 8th graders who still think they can make a difference in the world, while every now and then his voice breaks into a pitch that can only be heard by dogs. Then there is the 'real' speech, which, while being more serious and sober, is not half as much fun. And finally we have a concert by a more established, and I use that term loosely, band, who are usually ok, like local heroes 'Vildensky'. I can understand why some people would need a drink to get through that programme.

So if you want to see real speeches, sing 'Naar Jeg Ser et Roedt Flage Smaelde' and get down with the bus drivers, garbage men and other people who do real work, go to Faelledparken or Tangkrogen. But if you, like me, tried to be a hippie in 8th grade but somehow grew up to be a cynical old fart, The Botanical Garden is where you get top value for your entertainment dollar.

Today the weather sucks, and there's nothing in the Garden because people always trashed the place, but I guess we'll find a way to get a couple of beers anyway.

Finally, a tribute to the worst ever football kits.

Nope.dk - Danmarks Effektive Portal